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Opinion

When Artificial Intelligence Invades Church

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There’s a lot more to this artistry than speedily putting together a bunch of beautiful computer-generated words, melodies and sounds. Worship music that inspires the exaltation and adoration of a supernatural God, and causes the dissemination of His awesome Power to the listener, has got to have a Spirit that backs that lyrical content. That, right there, is the distinguishing element that no computer chip could possibly pull off!

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Saturday, 2nd May, 2026
4
2148
Satire

Cranes Petition CAF Over Early Exit From AFCON 2027

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“To be drawn alongside Morocco is like sharing the same house with Lucifer. It’s the kind of stuff that would cause our players to develop wobbly knees and paralysis on the pitch. It’s unacceptable and we hereby demand a preemptive investigation,” the statement read, in part.

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Friday, 20th March, 2026
2
5615
Satire

How Uganda Airlines Is Flying Into 2026

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At least there’s a couple of things to brag about: Uganda Airlines is the youngest fleet in Africa, with the most creative excuses on the continent, and the exceptional unique ability to make taxpayers feel like they’re personally sponsoring an expensive game of lottery with aeroplanes.

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Wednesday, 31st December, 2025
3822
Satire

The Solution To Uganda-Kenya’s Indian Ocean Stalemate

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First and foremost, the Kenyans have inhabited the ocean-front for a while now—like since the beginning of time. I say we switch places until the end of time! Worst case scenario, we should have some sort of timeshare agreement where the Indian Ocean belongs to the Kenyans from Monday at noon to Thursday, 11:59pm. Then Uganda takes over from Friday to Monday.

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Friday, 21st November, 2025
2
5293
Satire

Why Earth’s Second Moon Is a Bad Idea

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Remember in the movies when the full moon turned humans into blood-thirsty, hairy, howling beasts? Well, with two moons, full moon phases could double up or even overlap, and we would have hordes of werewolves roaming the suburbs all-year round.

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Friday, 31st October, 2025
2
2134
Opinion, People

Counterproductive Chaos: How Kirk’s Passing Amplified His Voice

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“You heal the country when you allow disagreement and you allow a microphone with people that have different views.” ‘Different views’ is such a modest and conservative way to describe people that are always spewing hate and getting totally worked up when expressing their opinions. But, yah, that’s one rare charismatic trait that starkly distinguished Charlie from his harshest critics. Not even the devil can answer that!

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Tuesday, 30th September, 2025
4854
Satire

CHAN 2024: East Africa’s Triumphant Defeat

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The silver lining on the Uganda Cranes’ dark cloud of defeat is that since our exit, peak-hour traffic jam has eased quicker than the pain of a stubbed toe. Previously, the sheer volume of football fans bottle-necking the suburbs neighboring the Mandela Stadium on match days felt like the wildebeest migration in the Serengeti. That’s not to mention the gridlocks which would’ve made driving in Manila seem like a relaxing countryside cruise.

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Tuesday, 26th August, 2025
2
4580
Movie Review, Opinion

Rust: When Fiction Became Reality

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Set in the 1800’s, the film follows Lucas, a little boy who accidentally kills a man and soon faces the grave consequences of his actions. He’s been sentenced to dangle from the hangman’s noose. His grandpa, an outlaw, himself, and on the run, learns about this and swings into action to try and save his grandson from the harsh sentence.

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Thursday, 31st July, 2025
2
2346
Satire

Razor Wire Vault: Kenya’s Newest Olympic Sport

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The Razor Wire Vault combines pole vaulting with a touch of survival instinct. Athletes are required to successfully clear 8-foot-tall razor wire obstacles using a wooden pole, while evading a rifle-wielding antagonist. Whereas the Teargas Dash is particular on physical requirements for enrollment, Razor Wire Vault cuts across. Yeah, you bet that damn razor wire will cut right across your flesh!

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Monday, 30th June, 2025
1846
Satire

Slow and Furious: Navigating the New Traffic Rules

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Unlike before, where you dealt directly with a sunbaked traffic officer who hadn’t had a sensible meal the entire day, you’ll no longer be able to haggle or negotiate your way out of a speeding ticket with the promise of lunch for him. You’ll henceforth be dealing with the Intelligent Transport Monitoring System (ITMS) and its multitude of hawk-eyed cameras.

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Saturday, 31st May, 2025
6652
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